He said: I almost cried when I saw the pic of you when **** took you to red robin you looked so pretty and your mine I can't have anyone else taking you away from me I'm sorry.---a year ago it was rocky for us but now we've learned to truly appreciate eachother<3
The music is rockish but super mellow. Geeeee not a big surprise it describes/fits his outlook on life. Thee whole “why party” thing. Which sucks ass cos Im so not over my party stage, in fact its been on hold for awhile. As much as I value my wonderful relationship with him…I’ve got to have my own fun even if that means doing something he doesnt “approve” of just because HE doesnt like to party anymore. You see he was in the MOB when I met him, yeah when he met me he wore huge shirts Im talkin’ XXX shirts down to his knees deal with a blunt in his hand and his caps sideways. Now well he likes to look/speak professional, wears fitted shirts and never smokes (once a year, if that). I changed his life around I can claim that clearly. Im super happy for him. But what about me? I hate thinking selfishly but hey this is the TIME of MY life I am so independent but Im not independently happy..I still have to abide by some of my parents rules and I always not often but aaalways turn down parties and girls nights out and fun nights, to stay home with him. By choice of course because I adore being with him late at night we go to his kitchen make a quick snack, watch movies and plainly grow closer everytime we do it. BUT Im like traped. The high school Cindy hasn’t outgrown me..I neeeeed to let loose and you know I think I very well deserve it when IM the one paying my own bills and one of his and all of our dates for the past year or so…it sucks bad cos I seem like the horrible monster all the time ‘caring’ about money too much but seriously you dont understand cos its not you working, feeling tired feet hurt bags under your eyes, no, you just live day by day. How nice would that be. I feel like if I dont gieve me some ME time in whatever way I want it Im going to grow a grudge..for him. I dont want that I see myself forever with him. He is such a good kid, a mommas boy thats for sure but gosh I wouldnt have to worry for our kids he’s gonna be a good dad and I have faith that soomeday soooon he’ll man up and get a fucking job. There I said it!
Today for our 2yrs&11months anniversary we went to the movies and had dinner. We watched “Life as we know it” and you loved it! Chick flick some people would call it but you’ve always liked chick flicks or ever since you been with me maybe? I might just call the shots when it comes to movies but you really liked this movie. How I know? You had tears in your eyes on the parts that I cried. This movie was ahhh so great. We decided our daughters name during this movie. Bella Sophia(: Its definently the little things that keeps you deeply in love when your in a long term relationship. You made a move as if you were going to hold my hand during the movie and I was moving my hand closer as if I was gonna hold yours but I smacked it instead haha and the funny thing was you said thats what you were going to do too! I think we fit together real well. Just like you said during dinner..”Baby this is real” I love you and I know why because Im happy and you keep me fighting. I thank God for meeting you at Charley’s Grilled Subs while working, its not suuuper romantic but we make up for that all the time!
My mom doesn’t have a solution for it. I don’t. hah my dad doesn’t…so wtf is there to do? I don’t wanna give up but I do want to live my oooown life. Well the plan starts asap. I might have to do this alone but I really dgaf.
First your 21st birthday then our 3rd anniversary then my 20th birthday! I love that I even spent my 17th birthday with you..so this will be the 4th birthday I celebrate with you and thats darn incredible to me but certainly believable because well we have future plans together(: I cant wait for this all to go down. I just want to keep you happy…all you ask for is movie night (every night) I mean you dont really wanna go to parties (unless its a real party that doesnt get raided or its SB!) but thats always impressed me because thats safety to me. Your serious. Im serious. When Im around you…I feel loved. I love that. I think I’ll enjoy the feeling forever yet Im looking forward to fightin’ with you—silly but it’s true. I want to keep experiencing crazy things with you. Im safe with you, with you I can be myself. Home Base; exsist!
but I dont need you to know my name because if I wanted, you would know all about me..I just dont care for un-necessary acquaintances in my life. I only need those who need me and you dont need me? Ok. we’re settled. DEUCES BITCH!