Last night, James was with his friends..played poker then video games and I was with my friend. We went out to eat PHO—hella bomb, I ain’t ever gna go anywhere else cos it’s tasted the same for 14years(: then I rented “the last house on the left” and we watched it in my room..it was a good movie!!
at 3am I snuck out to go eat at Dennys with jamo. Wer suckers for those damn $2specials(: at the end of every meal when we go out, when out server brings the check we have a little competition..to see which one of us guesses the right amount(: but during our little meal was what I loved..he said “babe it’s crazy that you sneak out alot…” I said well yeah I wanna be with you plus it’s risky so it drives up my adrenaline! He said “well I’ve been thinking..I would love to fall asleep with you everynight..yeno? I just like when wer asleep and I wake up before you and I kiss you and your asleep but sometimes you kiss back! I get this special feeling like I just want that every night now” my face and only words wer awwwwwh! He said “I mean it’s been 2 and a half years…I just want YOU.”
he’s the perfect guy I would love to live with, eventually. Right now I’m 19years old but I feel like 12 with my family..they need me around a little bit longer. We have the rest of our lives to be together(: I told him to wait another year..he said ok:/ he explained that special feeling so well..I effin love this guy<3
That, my friend, is what the internet is. Most people just don’t give a fuck about other people’s feelings and all those other sentimental crap. If you’re crying because your significant other of 5 years died in a car crash, chances are, somewhere on the internet people are laughing at your…
Trust is being unarmed of any weapons of attack. When everything you hear is the truth with no clothes on. Naked, and no cover up. All in all, trust is accessible, better yet vulnerable. Trust isn’t one-hundred-percent consistent on the regular, it breaks like everything else. Often confused with…
I’m unhappy again. I realized if I picture what used to make me smile…I’ll cry because I’ll remember how broken it is now. I’m talking about my family. It’s seems so disfunctional lately. On top of that, my body is doing all of this shit called side effects due to something I chose to do for no fucking reason it seems like. Bullshit man I fuckin tell you, everyone is full of crap! I realized that every friend I’ve had/have has/is screwed me over in some shape way or form. Meaning I have too. WTF is this for. I’m learning a lesson I’ll state that. But everything else?! How do I fix my family? How do I make MYSELF happy before anyone else? Selfish bastard. Let me down. What the fuck is this for then. Shit! I just wanna go to sleep too but this damn beating heart keeps running reality thru my mind. Stop beating for just a moment, until everything is normal again. I want to be pure. I need god. Why screw around fo real. I know what I need to do, for myself and my family. I hope everything else falls into place as well.
Women: If you ever thought about going on Birth control, in particular the Depo Provera (shot) READ THIS
This information is from this website—- http://www.chastity.com/node/292
I suggest you read the entire article, it’s very informative. But here is some information that just jumped out at me! Besides the side effects the nurses tell you at a clinic, there are these——->
Other side effects include menstrual irregularities, abdominal pain, dizziness, headache, fatigue, nervousness, backache, breast pain, leg cramps, depression, bloating, nausea, rash, insomnia, acne, joint pain, convulsions, numbness, coughing up blood, severe allergic reactions, spontaneous flow of breast milk, darkening of the facial skin, urinary infections, cysts, chest pain, anemia, artery blockage in the lung, loss of consciousness related to temporary insufficient blood flow to the brain, shortness of breath, fever, excessive sweating and body odor, dry skin, excessive thirst, blood disease, rectal bleeding, nipple bleeding, prevention of lactation (breast milk), paralysis, facial nerve damage, skin disease, excessive uterine growth, varicose veins, painful cramps, no hair growth or excessive hair growth in unusual places, and blood clots.
&i bet you didn’t know this either——>Depo-Provera is well known for decreasing a woman’s sex drive. Because of its ability to kill a person’s libido, the shot is sometimes injected into child molesters as a punishment! In California, the State Senate ruled that “The parolee shall begin medroxyprogesterone acetate [Depo-Provera] treatment one week prior to his or her release from confinement in the state prison or other institution and shall continue treatments until the Department of Corrections demonstrates to the Board of Prison Terms that this treatment is no longer necessary.” So the drug that is too dangerous for dogs but just right for sex offenders is offered to women at their local Planned Parenthood clinic!
The info in this article is updated . I found all of this info horrifying. I’ve been on this shot for a little over a month and started experiencing some of the side effects so I wanted to do what I should have done before stepping foot in that clinic. I can’t believe I didn’t learn more about the shot before I took got it. Now I’m more than ever afraid to get pregnant because if I do there is a hgh risk the baby will be born with birth defects, like mentioned in the article. I’m also worried about my health. James was right…I need to stop harming my body, no more birth control for me. We’ll just have to be careful and let god send me a child when he feels it’s right. Point blank——depo shot is a big no no:(
I love my mom. I love my dad. But they are barely trying to be parents. I thought I was just kidding around when I’d take control on family trips. I’d always have something to say about where we wer going and why. It was funny to me and I was just being me. I can always be myself with my family. One thing that I hated as the years went by, as the arguements continued was that they’d actually have the nerve to put me in the middle of things. I could never choose the right side to be on. I always have a soft spot for my mom but most of the time she’s wrong because mistakes that she does can be avoided BUT it’s always been small things like coming home late or going to the next door neighbors house for 30mins. I hate being in this position. My mom would make me be on her side no matter what but as soon as I got old enough to know better I knew I could finally say no and explain my no. I’ve lied to the cops for my mom. My parents have always argued. My dad..my stepdad actually has never hit my mom. Thank god. My mom and him met when I was three years old. He’s been the only father figure in my life. He’s not the perfect dad but he’s here. That’s what hurts and annoys me at the same time. Sometimes I think we’d be better off without him cos then no cops would be called cos there wouldn’t be fights between my mom and dad. Ugh tonight my mom called the cops. They always make me translate. Surprisingly this time I wasn’t asked for my name/age they just asked questions. Simple—next time they come out they’ll have to arrest someone. My brother just came in to ask what happened. He they argued cos the house is only so small. I filled him in and we remembered one of the worst times when my mom has called the cops:/ my mom called and said my dad had a gun..she lied he didn’t:( uggh so frighin cops or swat showed up with bright ass lights everywhere and a red dot on my dads shirt..laser yeah whatever. Man worst memory ever. Beside the time my mom took me and my brothers during a fight..to the streets we slept outside a hotel next to some ac machine thing it was warm so we wernt cold. Either way that was stupid of my mom..put us in danger man. I love em both but they need someone to fix all their problems or break up already. It makes me want my own place. I know where I can go anytime anyday but I’m not going to abandon my family like that. They need me..I think. I’ve always doubted myself:(
Here’s what aldos was like tonight—with everyone and they mommas there but i was rollin deep(: had Jenny, Carmen, Yvonne, Nancy, Claudia, Diana, Jerry, Michelle, Karen, Dave, David and some black dude forgot his name!? Yikes we took over the club hehe we were the first to dance at 10pm lmao it was kinda dead but we made it poppin! Seen some people from Mclane and central class of 08 baby!
so James has been very…or extra loving. It’s like he’s on his period or something?! Lmao idc it’s cute and I like it! Since Sunday he’s been wanting to see me buy I’ve been so wrapped up on my room and just at home doing my own thang..I kinda was eh about James for a few days cos hey I was doing me! But last night he picked me up from work cos I got off stuuupid early so anyway he showered while I was on the phone with Carmen (:/ I love her! She’s too amazing) then I showered then hehe yeah. Then this morning he wanted me to come nap with him after taking my bro to school at 7am. So I did(: for a bit. Then I got called into work made good tips and I called James to pick me up and take me home buuuut he wanted me to come over and WATCH HIM MOE THE LAWN! He’s a weirdo but hey I guess this is what love is<3
You’ll end up killing yourself trying to make people see you. Believe me, it is not worth it. Just be okay with you, it has drained me in every way possible. I love people but I can’t stand them too, I don’t talk much to people, I keep a distance.
That’s what everyone says when they see my room clean. They don’t know this time…Ima keep it clean! I did too much to let it get disgusting again. I love my room clean. I know how much I have, what I have and where it is! It’s amazing.. It’s become a new hobby. I just keep cleaning my room, my work will never be done(: I even look forward to coming home just to do moooore. I’m happy in my room. My mom and dad are fighting in the living room and my brothers are fighting over the ps3. While I’m in my room watching movies. I shut myself out. This is something no one can take away<3